"Game of Thrones" recap: The Starks make moves in "High Sparrow"
Here's the biggest shocker from last night's "Game of Thrones": A wedding took place at which nobody died.
Margaery and Tommen's wedding wasn't the only big development, though. Three members of Team Stark also made moves that marked significant developments for their characters, and Tyrion landed himself in hot water.
Below, we break down the biggest moments from season 5's third episode, "High Sparrow." Be warned, if you read further, spoilers are coming.
Sansa at Winterfell
We now know Littlefinger's proposal plans weren't for him - they're for Sansa, whom he wants to bring back to her childhood home of Winterfell and marry to Ramsay Bolton as part of a deal struck with his father, Roose.
Sansa is initially distraught, and not without reason - Roose Bolton, you'll remember, betrayed her family to team up with the Lannisters and helped orchestrate that little thing we call the Red Wedding. But Littlefinger, caressing her cheek in a way that'd be caring if it wasn't also creepy, tells her she needs to take charge of her fate. "You've been a bystander to tragedy since the day they executed your father. Stop being a bystander. Stop running," he says. "There's no justice in the world. Not unless we make it."
So she goes, meets a quickly smitten Ramsay (who acts like he's not a sociopathic torturer and murderer. He's almost charming!) and finds she still has allies at her childhood homestead. "The North remembers," tells one woman who shows her to her room.
Arya at the House of Black and White
In Braavos, Sansa's younger sister is sweeping floors and isn't happy about it. Jaqen H'Ghar scolds her for complaining ("valar dohaeris," he says, "All men must serve") and points out she can't become a Faceless Man while still having so many things that belong to Arya Stark. So she takes her possessions to the water and throws them in - except her sword, which she hides beneath some nearby rocks.
She also gets pushback from another girl who doesn't think Ayra deserves to be there. The two of them later wash the body of one of the dead men who drank the House fountain water. "What do we do with them after we wash them?" Arya asks. The other girl, interestingly, doesn't answer.
Cersei vs. Margaery
One of the highlights of this week's episode was the battle over Tommen by the boy-king's new wife and his mother. He and Margaery are married, and later when they are in bed she begins to plant seeds to turn him against his mother, hinting that he'll never be seen as a man unless he kicks her over to Casterly Rock. Cersei, meanwhile, gets in a few digs of her own while strolling with Tommen ("Do you think she's intelligent? I can't quite tell!") before facing off against her daughter-in-law face to face in a battle of fake smiles and faux sweetness.
What should Margaery call Cersei now, she asks -- Queen Mother, or Dowager Queen? If Cersei's smiles could kill, Margaery would already be dead.
Cersei and the Sparrows
The other bit of King's Landing development this week had to do with religion. The Sparrows assault and humiliate the High Septon after finding him "worshiping" prostitutes dressed like the seven gods in Littlefinger's brothel. They drag him out, naked, to parade through the streets.
He complains to Cersei, wanting the Sparrows punished, but she throws him in jail and goes to meet the High Sparrow, the religious group's leader, who turns out to be an old man in a dirty robe doling out soup to the poor. Faith and the crown are the two pillars of the nation, she tells him, and they have to protect each other. I'm curious to see if the High Sparrow is really as carious and pious as he seems, and what this new alliance will do for Cersei.
Jon Snow makes a stand
At Castle Black, Jon formally turns down Stannis' offer to make him an honest-to-goodness Stark, citing his vows to the Night's Watch and his new role as the group's Lord Commander. "You're as stubborn as your father. And as honorable." Stannis tells him, but it's not a compliment. Honor, he says, is what got Ned Stark killed.
Jon issues his first set of commands as Lord Commander, naming Ser Alliser Thorne first ranger and sending the weasely Janos Slynt away to repair castle Greyguard. The latter refuses, and Jon gets the chance to assert his new authority by taking him outside and beheading him for refusing to obey orders. After he does it, Jon looks up and sees Stannis watching, nodding his head in approval.
Other developments worth noting:
We got another nice scene with Brienne and Podrick as they continue their Sansa surveillance. He tells her he truly respects and admires her, and she offers to help him learn to fight and shares stories from her past. She also reminds us she wants to avenge Renley's death - it was a shadow that killed him, but she knows Stannis was behind it.
And, finally, let's talk about Tyrion, who was going stir-crazy en route to Volantis and demanded they get out and about in the city. He drags Varys to a brothel, chats up a whore but then decides (probably because of Shae) that he can't go through with it. He goes to relieve himself off a wall and gets kidnapped by Ser Jorah, who ties him up and says he's taking the imp "to the queen."